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I was so naive and stupid

October 10th, 2010

I’m an idiot.  Or rather, I was.

Looking back about six months, I can’t help but notice how naive and wrong I was about so many things.  Jejune misstatements and patent falsehoods.  I shake my head at my former self.

And that’s a good thing.

I want always to be improving.  If I get to the point where I can evaluate myself from six months prior, and I don’t see any difference from my current self, then I have failed.

I set goals.  I achieve goals.  I learn new things.  I refine.  I filter.  I tweak.  I discard.  I collect.

Juggling lacrosse balls with my goalie gear in the background

Juggling: a goal from long ago, finally accomplished.

This is not some sort of desperate race to avoid some depression-driven self-reproach.  No, I think rather highly of myself.  My current self.  That old me?  Well, he was an idiot, but he’s gone now.

And in six months, I hope that my present-day me looks like an idiot, too.

  1. Max
    January 9th, 2011 at 19:33 | #1

    Well said. I believe the cost of personal growth is only the resentment felt looking at one’s former self.

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